If you were born or moved to a suburb in Nowheresville, then you can probably relate to some of the following high school experiences. You know what we’re talking about. In one of those towns that are so small that it makes M. Night Shyamalan’s “The Village” look like a Metropolis, just about anything goes. Aren’t you glad you moved away?
Déjà vu All Over Again
The number of students in school was smaller than the town’s population, so naturally, you’d wind up having the same teachers and using the same textbooks your big brother or big sister used, a school year or two earlier. Ah! The simple life!
Pulling Double Duty
The town was so small that there was no need to hire extra teachers. It was just easier to have your regular teacher do double-duty, but the only thing that didn’t double was their pathetic salary. It’s about time we start paying quality wages to our beloved teachers!
Field Trips Were Dull
A small town usually means that there aren’t any landmarks around, except for a stop sign or a farm full of cows. Three to be exact. So, your school field trips probably involved milking Betsy the calf, or checking out the way they took care of their crops in the neighboring farm.
You Dated Someone’s Castoff
Sure, you dated your friend or your sibling’s ex, but come on! It’s not like there were a whole lot of options in town. You can’t really ask friends to never date anyone you dated in the past, because exes were pretty much up for grabs. To be fair, there were only like a few dozen people you could date!
You Loitered Too Much
What else was there to do? Absolutely nothing, so you just lay in a field all night and hoped that a gofer wouldn’t dig up from the ground and tried biting you while you slept. Loitering wasn’t exactly exciting, but it kept you guys entertained for a long time.
You Had A Curfew
Oh, not that kind of curfew. It was a curfew for minors, which made you feel like no one in town could trust you, but how much trouble could you get into anyway when everyone had their eyes on you? Plus, everyone lives virtually 10 blocks away. Technically speaking, if you weren’t home, you probably were walking or hanging around with the neighbors.
Chocolates On Sale
Hershey’s Chocolate bars? Forget it! Your school forced you to sell World’s Finest Chocolate bars at practically every event. But hey, at least they were peanut- and gluten-free. And with a price tag as tempting as that, who could resist getting a little chocolate fever and ordering a whole bunch?
These Things Made You Late
Your mom and dad couldn’t drop you off on time because there was always something like this or a big old tractor going at one mile an hour on a one-way road. I bet that doesn’t happen in New York, huh? Don’t get me wrong. Traffic sucks pretty much everywhere in the world!